Transness.org

Exploring Gender Identity

Self-Acceptance Key

on July 17, 2010

The key to self-acceptance is first of all finding out who you are.  This is not as simple as it may seem.  The person you see in the mirror is not necessarily who you are.  The body is more like a vehicle than who you are.  Just like your car is not who you are neither is your body.  Getting to the point where you are a happy with the image in the mirror and with yourself is sometimes a long road.  There is no right way to get there either so leave the GPS at home and instead use your intuition.

Introspection comes easily for some of us and much harder for others, so if you are one of those who does not like to look within, then this will be even more important to you, although you may need to get help. 

The journey goes something like this, look in the mirror what do you see?  Ok, this is your vehicle.  It was given you for a reason and most likely that reason is that it will take you where you need to go, not necessarily where you want to go.  Right here and now, STOP thinking you know where you are going.  Stop thinking you know who you are.  Let go of any preconceptions you may have acquired.  Each day is a new day and one with the potential to discover yourself. 

Now that you have discovered your vehicle go take it for a ride.  Test the cornering ability, the acceleration, and the stopping distance.  See how good you are at changing situations, demands on your services or skills, and how well you can say no.  Once you learn to say no, then you can move on and learn to say Yes.  No is easy, but Yes carries responsibilities.  Of course this will lead to rewards also.  On the road keep a notebook with you and record your best features, skills and attributes.  Get to know what you are good at and what you need work on. 

You have a long list now and are ready to pursue this even further.  Stay focused on the desirable features, skills and attributes.  The ones you really like and have already accepted.  Staying motivated at this level is about focusing on your good attributes and if you noticed any undesirable attributes on the list you can acknowledge them, thank them for being a part of you and then letting them go.  To symbolize this write them down on a piece of paper.  In a safe location, burn the paper while thinking of your desires.  What are you grateful for?  What is next for you?  Be optimistic and joyful, you have just let go of all your troubles. 

The process continues and goes deeper each time.  Life will evolve and get better and better!  Before you know it love and acceptance will exist in you on a deeper level than you even knew existed!

Remember a few things along the way.  Everything happens for a reason (unless you decide it doesn’t), Resistance is futile, and everyone is going to the same place, only in different ways, through different means, and from different perspectives.  Joy is in the journey!

 🙂  Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity

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