Transness.org

Exploring Gender Identity

Be The Observer

on March 14, 2012

Observation is our best tool in transition.  Children use this technique and so should we, so what do I mean “Be the Observer”?  It is really very simple and it goes like this.  Of course you must know what your desired result is to start with.  It is like writing a good book, you start with the ending!

Let’s use the example of male to female transition.  You know you are a woman in a male body, so hold a vision of the woman you feel yourself to be.  Create a picture and keep it with you.  Share your vision with others who are supportive.  (Stay away from people who constantly criticize)  Desire to express yourself more appropriately as the woman you are by learning how to be a woman not a man.  Use the power of observation to simply observe women in action, walking, talking, getting angry, laughing, smiling, working, etc.  It is good to choose a woman who you would like to be like, a role model.

Observe how they dress, coordinate colors and styles, cook, clean, shop, and all the usual daily tasks.  The power of observation will teach you how to act like a lady in public, walk like a lady, hand & body gestures, ways of styling hair, etc.  You get the idea now to watch your role model(s) every move and copy it!  The result will be as good as your choice in role models.

Obviously you have your own personality, likes and dislikes, however even most of these are learned from your parents and family or the people you are around the most.  If there are traits you do not like, then you can pick and choose just as you would in a buffet line!

As you practice being the observer you will create the person of your dreams.  The secret to it is being aware enough to make the observations consciously so that you can incorporate them into your behavior.  Be very attuned to detail and notice the small things.  Life is full of nuance and that is the beauty of it all.

🙂 Sequoia Elisabeth

Unity in Gender Diversity    Free eBooks

 

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