Transness.org

Exploring Gender Identity

Transgender Regret

on February 13, 2019

Is it real? Do trans* individuals have regret? How can anyone know what is “real”? I have been studying this all my life. The fact is that you cannot know what works till you try it. This is why when the Standards of Care for Transgenders was first established they had a mandatory trial period. Live as a woman for 2 yrs and if this works then move on with CHT and Surgery. Yet over the years this has become less and less till now it does not exist at all. In fact the whole treatment is a recommendation only and totally relies in the judgment of the patient. While I do agree we should have final say here I also know that we are too close to see the truth.

“After de-transitioning, I know the truth: Hormones and surgery may alter appearances, but nothing changes the immutable fact of your sex.” (https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/voices/2019/02/11/transgender-debate-transitioning-sex-gender-column/1894076002/)

My comment on the above article: I would say I knew this going in, but would not accept it. It’s good that Walt got the therapy he needed to heal. Suffering is inevitable in this life, so have no regrets about that. At the age of 58 (transitioned at 45), I feel like gender is meaningless and sex is fixed at birth. I was warned repeatedly and yet I “had” to do it or would die. Just how I felt. I focus more on Spirituality now and less on the physical which does change. Spirit never changes and this is the rock I need. I am not my body, I am free….

“Yet, in hindsight, after transitioning from male to female and back again, I see that many important topics are ignored by such advice, placing vulnerable people at risk. Four crucial omissions are most obvious and problematic.” https://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2017/04/19080/ Read the article for these 4 valid points.

Alas the power of the mind. We have no concept of just how powerful we really are. It is our dream after all. Yes, I know now that life is but a dream so I “row, row, row”. Actually during transition I dove deeply into Spirituality, not religion mind you, but spirituality. I found ACIM (A Course In Miracles). A famous ACIM author refers to life here as “psycho-planet” and basically the course teaches that life as we know it is Ego, not ego as Freud defines it, but more like everything you experience. It is easy to understand how a transgender mindset can take hold in a world that hates you (because you hate yourself). ACIM teaches the Ego is trying to kill you, because this would prove that the Ego is real, that death is real. Jesus is teaching us just the opposite. The ego sends us on wild goose chases that end back where you started and Transgender is a perfect example of this. Instead of seeing perfection we are taught to see fault. We are sinful at birth according to Christianity. The world is based on guilt! ACIM teaches forgiveness, not because we are sinful, but because we are Not. Because we mistakenly bought into the whole delusion.

So do I regret Transitioning? Yes, and No. Deep down I knew the result before I started. It’s not about the destination, but the journey. I needed this journey. I needed to get over my fear of Love, my need for acceptance, and most of all my feelings of guilt associated with it all. Yes, I do have a very strong feminine drive, yet I was born male. Some say that is the very definition of transgender. There is nothing wrong with me though, and I know it. Gender and even physical sex is an ego mind manifestation. There are rules to life here on psycho-planet and one of them is sex is fixed. Gender is more of a mindset or concept than a reality. I actively seek the good in life (the dream) so I can awaken to the truth. God is all there is, there is no “me”; “I” is ego. Letting go of this while focusing on Holy Spirit is the way home. For more on ACIM, I recommend “Disappearance of the Universe” by Gary Renard. For more on Trans* Regret, just scour the internet. I found story after story, some ending with suicide and others with life going on. Walt Heyer is the later.

Sequoia Elisabeth

https://onenessministry.info/


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